Keeping a Cool Head in Tough Times

Hello Everyone -

first off, my apologies for such a delay in writing my next Blog entry. As some of you know, when I'm not at my office, I work at Pacific College teaching and supervising students in our clinics. We recently had midterms, accreditation surveys and other "fun" projects to work on, which took time away from blogging. But now I'm back!! ;-)

The time away, and recent U.S. and world events, certainly gave me many ideas upon which to write. I had hoped to write a single entry on "how to take care of yourself in troubled times." But I realized that could be a tome of information - and would take quite a while to write. So, I've decided to still write on this topic, but break it down into several entries over the weeks ahead. More like a "thought for the day" instead of a "10+ ways to deal with your stress."

The first thing that I want to ponder is the idea of Control. Right now it may feel like so many aspects of our lives are out of control: the housing market, job security, the stock market, the economy, etc. And that feeling of being out of control is, needless to say, stressful! ....One way to begin to reduce some of that stress is to examine which things in our lives are within our control, and which things are not. For example, the fate of huge financial companies like AIG.... not in our control. Our health, whether or not we exercised today, what kinds of foods we ate, the people we spent time with, etc - in our control. And amazingly enough, when we take care of those more simple things over which we have control: exercise, diet, time spent with people we care about; the stress levels often decrease and the things that loomed so large, and not in our control, can often look smaller or at least less intimidating.

A counselor I once knew shared with me a list called the "Five Guarantees." It is a simple little tool and one that I have kept posted within view, wherever I've lived, since about 1988. The paper upon which these Guarantees are listed has browned with age, the edges tattered and brittle from years of being taped on doors, desks, walls, and then moved only to be taped up again in new locations; but the message is still invaluable and worth sharing.

Five Guarantees

1. You cannot control what other people choose to think.
2. You cannot control what other people choose to feel.
3. You cannot control what other people choose to do.
4. If you attempt to do any of the first three, or any combination of the first three, you will feel inadequate, frustrated, angry, and depressed.

5. What you DO have control over is:
a. what you think
b. what you feel
c. what you do
d. how you choose to respond to what others directly express and do.


May your week ahead be a peaceful, joyful and prosperous one. And may these Guarantees help lighten your load and lift your spirit.

Peace,
Pat